Convo with my mom at the doctor's office:

Me: My stomach has to be really stupid.

Mom: Why?

Me: Well, the average piece of gum takes 10 years to digest.

Mom: Yeah.

Me: Well, when I was little I had to have swallowed eighty bajillion pieces of gum. Yet everytime I get hungry my stomach eats itself and growls.

Mom: I don't know you.